AskNana

Walking in the room, dark,cluttered ,it smells of death ,it’s cool and impersonal ,cinderblock walls with only a bed and a nightstand…I look to the right and in the bed lay an 83 pound woman…98 years old , her eyes are open half way slightly rolled back and glassy ,her breathing is rapid and then stops …5..10..20 seconds …then a gasp and she continues on..mouth and tongue are dry…hasn’t eaten or drank in days…she knows I am there I put my hand in hers and her hand grasps mine with a weak movement her lips mumble but it’s only air..no words are formed…I stay a awhile, talking, letting her know I am there..to not be afraid…she trys to speak but there is not enough strength…I tell her to rest and hold her hand…her body relaxes…she drifts off again. I watch and wonder…who were you before this moment? Where are your family? How is it possible that in 25 years as a Nurse , I have sat with more people in the moment of there death alone then I have witnessed surrounded by loved ones. This saddens me to know the culmination of all of our life’s efforts and work as a human, mother,father,child etc…in the end all those we have worried about and cared for are not there in the end when we take our last breath on this earth…its a stranger , that sits with us as we depart this world more often then not. The family “can’t bare to see it”, or are busy working, or “Have said there goodbye already”…Its amazing how fast they rally for your money or belongings after…we are only on this earth a short while…I hope when your last breath is taken , someone you love is holding your hand other then me.